Armed with an Emmy and an Opinion

Why is it that such an influential woman always speaks as if she’s under the influence?

Before you start judging me…

I didn’t turn there. It was on. I was at the gym. A hostage to its messages. Strengthening my physical fitness, while it weakened my mental fitness.

The View.

A show with five women, from five different backgrounds: Journalism, celebrity, sub-celebrity, sub-sub-celebrity, and Elisabeth Hassel-what-the-heck-is-she-saying-beck.

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Apparently, she finds that Erin Andrews has been wearing more and more revealing outfits on Dancing with the Stars lately.

Almost a year ago, the ESPN reporter was the victim of a peeping tom, who is now in jail.

Hasselbeck *shudder* said, “I think in light of what happened… and as inexcusable as it was for that horrific guy to go in and try to peep on her in her hotel room… In some way, if I’m him, I’m like, ‘Man, I could have just waited 12 weeks. (Nervous laughter from crowd.) I could have seen this, a little bit less, without the prison time'.”

So let’s review the situation here…

The never cleavage-flaunting Hasselbeck, thinks Andrews is wrong for sometimes wearing cleavage-flaunting and (underwhelmingly) risqué costumes, on a show known for its sexy costumes. All because, a while back, some pervert decided to secretly videotape a naked Andrews in her hotel room?

Seriously?

I thought this argument ended in the 80s with afterschool specials, only to be reinforced later on that “very special episode” of Blossom.

At least Gabourey Sidibe, a guest host, rebuked Hasselbeck by saying, “She was not getting paid in the hotel room.”

Now, I have been the victim to a recurring peeping tom. And it is scary. You feel violated and unsafe. When that happened, I had no choice. Somebody surreptitiously spied upon me, while in the privacy of my own home.

When I go out, I have a choice. I choose how I look (well, with curly hair, sometimes it chooses that for me) and what I wear (though with great difficulty sometimes, as I can agonize over “the pink one or the green one?”).

And nobody is entitled to violate me based upon any of those choices.

Now, I am not a feminist. I am a humanist. Equality for all. And within that equality, you need feminist philosophy, or equality will never be attained.

If not for all the positively influential and hard-working women before me, I probably would not be able to use my voice, and write so loud. I probably would not be able to vote. I probably would not be able to make choices. (Well, I still can’t always make choices, but that is purely a decision-making problem.)

Then again, if not for those women Hassel would probably have to shut her beck too.

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What cleavage?

Hasselbeck, a sub-sub-sub celebrity, who got catapulted into said celebrity by surviving on a couple bowls of rice a day to place fourth on a reality competition.

(She had an unfair advantage though. So few functioning brain cells don’t require that much nourishment.)

People such as Elisabeth Hassel-speaking-out-of-her-beck, who are in such influential positions, who speak to millions every day, who have three children, and who are called upon for “advice” by Vice-President of the United States of America Joe Biden, scare me more than my peeping tom.

I wonder if President Mahmoud Ahmandinejad has called her yet to advise Iran’s delegate on the UN’s Commission of the Status of Women. She can surely help with that.

Hasselbeck was last seen armed with an Emmy and an opinion. You are advised to turn off your TV, if you see her talking.

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